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WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Biden Administration seems to be in turmoil as of late. After passing the eleven-month mark commemorating the end of the Orange Man atrocious reign of terror, the dissatisfaction of the American people regarding Biden’s attempt at detrumpifying the country has reached new highs. Surprisingly, they seem to want more from the most popular President in U.S. history, as the polls seem to indicate, and the ruling by decree, the ice cream licking, the unclear mumbling speeches, the snoozing on the job, and the crackdown on the unvaccinated Trump supporters apparently won’t cut it.
However, a scrutinizing analysis of the recent polls done by a bipartisan DNC firm, free of unsophisticated, bigoted, and biased critics, has reportedly shown that there was, in fact, a hidden cause that could explain the dip in support of the beloved President.
In the first place, the report showed that the slump in approval couldn’t have resulted from Biden’s policies. This discovery can be explained by the fact that there’s apparently no better time to be alive right now, especially after Trump’s defeat and removal from office, despite the few hiccups like the eventful U.S. withdrawal from Afghanistan, the inflation soaring to near 30-year highs, The Great Resignation, the “strong” economic recovery despite the disappointing jobs report, the 500 + days to slow the spread, Hunter’s shenanigans, the cultural enrichment coming from the southern border, and the fiery but mostly peaceful woke enforcers roaming the streets of America. Also, according to the same report, this downward trend couldn’t have ensued from the admirable persona of the Commander in Chief. What more could the American people want from a Commander in chief with such a strong and vigorous character, an abundance of transparency, a powerful will to help the country, and with such inspiring and coherent communicational skills?
Therefore, the only valid explanation that came up from the analysis was that the pollers didn’t bother to survey the dead voters, as of late, who are known to be his most loyal base. All in all, this reasoning made the most sense because, although they are physically unable to show their support, the Democrats have always been able to count on them in the past. Moreover, those voters were particularly useful when they needed a few thousand votes at 4 a.m. to win an election, as we have seen during the 2020 race. Thus, the results of the polls would have been much favorable to Biden if his staunched deceased supporters had been surveyed properly.
Furthermore, after acknowledging this appeasing discovery, some journalists went to different cemeteries, all across the U.S., for comments regarding the findings. Here’s some :
Marilynn Longpassed, Fulton County in Georgia, Died in 1897 of a horse carriage accident.
“ ………………………………………………”
Nelson Logan, County of Milwaukee in Wisconsin, Died in 2020 of drowning because of Covid.
“ UGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH ”
Jeffery Epstein, New York County in New York, Died in 2019 of an unintentional and enforced suicide.
“ ……….. AGKKKKKKKKKKK ………….. AGGGGKKKKKK …….. “
Jim Barry, Wayne County in Michigan, Was declared dead in 2020 after going missing during a woke corporate retreat.
“ Come on, let me out! Is somebody there? I’ve already denounced my whiteness for the sixth time today. Hellooooooo? “
In conclusion, as demonstrated by this analysis, there are always hidden explanations when it comes to the results from polls. Thus, there’s still no reason for the Democrats to panic considering that Joe Biden has not become the most popular President in U.S. history only because of some well time and minor Election Law changes in the Swing States. Nevertheless, the real question to ask now is if the Americans who are still stuck in Afghanistan, despite having plenty of chances to leave, will improve his approval ratings if they ever manage to come back home whole.
Why did the Left have such a big meltdown over Trump serving fries at a McDonald's?
NEW YORK, N.Y. – Shocking news coming from Trump Tower this morning. After only a year of unity, peacefulness, and normalcy, the Orange Man will be back in office next week.
As a matter of fact, according to some undisclosed sources close to him, Trump has just fully transitioned into Joseph Robinette Biden Jr. himself after starting to identify as him not so long ago.
After his crushing defeat and sort of concession in January 2021, the 45th President of the United States of America reportedly fell into a deep depression. During this dark period of his life, Trump allegedly didn’t feel like himself anymore. (A sad violin music starts playing.) It was at this point that the Orange Man found out that he was in the wrong body. (The narrator begins tearing up.) Allegedly, the only thing that he ever wanted was to become a two-term president, and having that irregularly taken from him took its toll on his poor soul. (The narrator starts squealing as the sad music intensifies.) Yet, despite ...
WASHINGTON, D.C. – After almost an entire year of denial, deflection, and cackling laughter, the Biden-Harris Administration, also known as the Harris-Biden’s handlers Administration, finally decided to try to put an end to the unpleasant but convenient seasonal surge at the border.
The virtuous and well-thought-out plan will consist of allowing the U.S. southern border to be utilized as a giant nuclear testing site and for F-15 airstrike drills.
Since President Biden, who was running for Senate last fall, took office in January, he has repeatedly mentioned that White supremacy is the most lethal threat to the democracy of the United States of America. Therefore, this masterful plan will not only allow the U.S. Armed Forces to use almost 2000 miles of borderland to get ready to annihilate the rising domestic white supremacy threat but also fix the issue at the border.
However, according to some independent conspiracy theorists and some Trump apologists in the media, there’s reportedly ...
