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NEW YORK, N.Y. – Shocking news coming from Trump Tower this morning. After only a year of unity, peacefulness, and normalcy, the Orange Man will be back in office next week.
As a matter of fact, according to some undisclosed sources close to him, Trump has just fully transitioned into Joseph Robinette Biden Jr. himself after starting to identify as him not so long ago.
After his crushing defeat and sort of concession in January 2021, the 45th President of the United States of America reportedly fell into a deep depression. During this dark period of his life, Trump allegedly didn’t feel like himself anymore. (A sad violin music starts playing.) It was at this point that the Orange Man found out that he was in the wrong body. (The narrator begins tearing up.) Allegedly, the only thing that he ever wanted was to become a two-term president, and having that irregularly taken from him took its toll on his poor soul. (The narrator starts squealing as the sad music intensifies.) Yet, despite this important discovery, it was only the beginning of his sorrows.
At first, all the confusion and questioning about his true self was not affecting him too much in his day-to-day life. Although, as time went by, he slowly started to become more and more miserable. During these challenging times, Trump’s face got apparently paler (lost a few levels on the Orangeness scale), and some even said that his golf swing was way off. Not only that, people close to him shared that he was also no longer able to enjoy the things that he used to take pleasure in before this tragic event. Things like conspiring with the remaining Soviet agents left to this day, implementing advice from Kushner, complementing “Rocket Man”, envisioning the future might of the “Super Duper Missile”, dancing to YMCA, and enjoying his favorite McDonald’s delicacies.
However, through struggle, Trump has found, once more, a path to the Presidency by becoming good old Creepy Uncle Joe.
Furthermore, with the goal in mind of assuring a quick transition without scandals and preventing anger outbursts from his new Democrat comrades and acolytes in the media, Trump has been working really hard to become like Joe Biden as much as possible. Since he departed from office, Trump has reportedly been sniffing kids relentlessly, empowering women by groping them inappropriately, working that tongue on some ice cream, taking part in shady deals with his sons, and been overdosing on hydroxychloroquine to reduce his mental capacities. Some even said he’s also willing to become less orange from the get-go.
All in all, because of his efforts, the retransition should be swift and without too much resistance. However, it will be interesting to see if Biden plans to pull the same trick on Trump if election fraud evidence arises, even though he may no longer be with us by then.
Why did the Left have such a big meltdown over Trump serving fries at a McDonald's?
WASHINGTON, D.C. – After almost an entire year of denial, deflection, and cackling laughter, the Biden-Harris Administration, also known as the Harris-Biden’s handlers Administration, finally decided to try to put an end to the unpleasant but convenient seasonal surge at the border.
The virtuous and well-thought-out plan will consist of allowing the U.S. southern border to be utilized as a giant nuclear testing site and for F-15 airstrike drills.
Since President Biden, who was running for Senate last fall, took office in January, he has repeatedly mentioned that White supremacy is the most lethal threat to the democracy of the United States of America. Therefore, this masterful plan will not only allow the U.S. Armed Forces to use almost 2000 miles of borderland to get ready to annihilate the rising domestic white supremacy threat but also fix the issue at the border.
However, according to some independent conspiracy theorists and some Trump apologists in the media, there’s reportedly ...
WASHINGTON, D.C. – The Biden Administration seems to be in turmoil as of late. After passing the eleven-month mark commemorating the end of the Orange Man atrocious reign of terror, the dissatisfaction of the American people regarding Biden’s attempt at detrumpifying the country has reached new highs. Surprisingly, they seem to want more from the most popular President in U.S. history, as the polls seem to indicate, and the ruling by decree, the ice cream licking, the unclear mumbling speeches, the snoozing on the job, and the crackdown on the unvaccinated Trump supporters apparently won’t cut it.
However, a scrutinizing analysis of the recent polls done by a bipartisan DNC firm, free of unsophisticated, bigoted, and biased critics, has reportedly shown that there was, in fact, a hidden cause that could explain the dip in support of the beloved President.
In the first place, the report showed that the slump in approval couldn’t have resulted from Biden’s policies. This discovery can be explained...
